Thread: Thursday funny

EVERYTHING HAS A GENDER
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >You may not know this but many nonliving things have a gender.
> > >
> > >
> > >Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything
> > >in, but you can see right through them.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >Copiers are Female, because once turned off; it
> > >takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective
> > >reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed,
> > >but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >A Tire is Male, because it goes bald and it's often
> > >over-inflated.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >A Hot Air Balloon is Male, because, to get it to go
> > >anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of
> > >course, there's the hot air part.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >Sponges are Female, because they're soft,
> > >squeezable and retain water.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >A Web Page is Female, because it's always getting
> > >hit on.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old
> > >lines to pick people up.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >An Hourglass is Female, because over time, the
> > >weight shifts to the bottom.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >A Hammer is Male , because it hasn't changed much
> > >over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have
> > >around.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >A Remote Control is Female. Ha! You thought it'd
> > >be male , didn't you? But consider this - it gives a
> > >man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he
> > >doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he
> > >keeps trying!

cheers
mog

rofl. i like it.

Two eskimos in a boat, weather gets a bit cold so they light a fire. The boat sinks and the eskimos drown. Just goes to show, you can't have your kayak and heat it!!

A bloke applies for a job at a blacksmiths.
The blacksmith asks him "have you any experience at shoeing horses?"
The bloke replies "No but I told a donkey to f**k off once!"


Irishman claims world record for jigsaw puzzle solving by completing one in 6 months. When the Guiness Book of Records question the vailidity of the claim, the Irishman says it most certainly is as it states 3-5 years on the box

Two monkeys in a bath, one goes oo oo ah ah the other one goes put some cold water in man!

Man walks into doctors with nothing but cling film covering his tool.
Man - "Doctor, doctor, i think i'm going mad"
Doctor - "I can see clearly your nuts"


Paddy and Mick flying a plane.....Paddy says to Mick "I tink I'll do a loop da loop" Mick replies "But Paddy won't we fall out?" Paddy says "No we'll still be friends"


added a few more jokes

cheers
mog

LOL

Love em Mog

LOL. Some good ones there.