Movies Not Worth Watching

[ResLo]

Drive, worst let down of the year given its critical acclaim.

[rec]

Catch .44

Tarantino try-hard, which falls far, far short.

[Milenko]

The Three Musketeers (2011).

I know I shouldn't be surprised when shit like this gets remade every decade; but holy fuck is this one bad.
They've butchered the fucking story beyond recognition.

That said; i would LOVE to watch this movie with Harb. Just to see his disbelief when certain things happen. Like the French building an air-ship in 5 days without any designs (complete with steam-punk crossbows, Gatling cannons and flame-throwers). Or other ridiculous shit, like Milla Jovavich's acting.

Someone hook a generator up to Dumas' spinning corpse, stat.

[Milenko]

Went and saw Chronicle tonight.

I am disappoint.

[Ritzo90]

Went and saw Chronicle tonight.

I am disappoint.

Whys tht. The trailer looks awesome

Sent from my HTC Desire using Tapatalk

[Milenko]

It had a lot of potential.

Unfortunately they just decided to make it a 'handy-cam daily video log' about a token black guy, a nerd/jock and an angsty teen who get super-powers. They don't even do anything exciting with it.

[Milenko]

Just got back from seeing John Carter.

Pretty terrible.

[Kagetsu]

I wouldn't say it was bad though... more or less just fluff. I enjoyed it, but I honestly didn't go in with huge expectations, graphically it was pretty good. Movie wise it had a fairly solid plot (though based on pretty flimsy physics and realities) but then life on mars of the variety they were getting at is a pretty big stretch.

My advice would be don't go in expecting it to be Iron Man, but it's hardly a Phantom Menace.

[Milenko]

I thought the story was shocking. A-typical commoner marries princess, while befriending native savages fairy-tale.

That in itself isn't a bad thing - but combine it with shitty acting (Lynn Collins' performance was actually decent) and the focus shifting to irrelevant pieces of the plot (nearly walked out when she started whining why she ran away from home in the desert); rather than explaining the mysterious energy sources, or religious mythology or even racial histories and you end up with a fucking disaster of a narrative. They spent, what, 20-25 minutes purely setting up a plot device to let Dejah believe he's from Earth?

The only redeeming feature about that movie is the visuals (except for the physics - the leaping is retarded) and Lynn Collins (she is exceptionally stunning in this film). And don't get me started on that penis-head dog thing.

I also never understand why they insist on having a plot twist if they give it away in the first 10 minutes of the movie. (Ie, reading from the fucking Journal).

Phantom Menace was better, imo. At least it had light-sabres.

[Aegis]

Young Adult - probably not a bad movie, but it was marketed as romantic comedy and written by the same woman that wrote Juno so expectations were high. Unfortunately the humour was minimal, and the main character (Charlize Theron) was mostly unlikeable.

It was interesting in and of itself, but yeah, I'm putting it here because it wasn't what was advertised.

[ResLo]

Yeah it was really not good. I found very little humour and was expecting it to get better at any minute, only it didn't and instead descended into the main character self imploding.

[Jay]

I thought the story was shocking. A-typical commoner marries princess, while befriending native savages fairy-tale.

That in itself isn't a bad thing - but combine it with shitty acting (Lynn Collins' performance was actually decent) and the focus shifting to irrelevant pieces of the plot (nearly walked out when she started whining why she ran away from home in the desert); rather than explaining the mysterious energy sources, or religious mythology or even racial histories and you end up with a fucking disaster of a narrative. They spent, what, 20-25 minutes purely setting up a plot device to let Dejah believe he's from Earth?

The only redeeming feature about that movie is the visuals (except for the physics - the leaping is retarded) and Lynn Collins (she is exceptionally stunning in this film). And don't get me started on that penis-head dog thing.

I also never understand why they insist on having a plot twist if they give it away in the first 10 minutes of the movie. (Ie, reading from the fucking Journal).

Phantom Menace was better, imo. At least it had light-sabres.

Disney film. And don't you be dissin penis dog. He was awesome.

[Aegis]

Yeah it was really not good. I found very little humour and was expecting it to get better at any minute, only it didn't and instead descended into the main character self imploding.

I thought for sure, at the culmination of the baby naming ceremony, that it was all going to turn around, but nope

spoiler:

off to shag the fat man and achieve nothing instead

[ResLo]

Watched 'One for the Money' last night... worst story/editing I've ever experienced. I don't know if the film editor, the director or writer is the blame for the disjointed cut scenes scattered about this film but its really bad.

Back to the film itself, not even a naked Katherine Heigel with sideboob can save this turkey... 3/10.

[Jay]

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